Divorce Attorney Scott J. Stadler

    • 10 SEP 20
    Why You Should Not be in a Rush to Divorce

    Why You Should Not be in a Rush to Divorce

    Statistics show that approximately 50% of marriages end in divorce. Divorce is not something to be taken lightly, though. It is a highly emotional process for all involved. It splits up a family. One household becomes two, often causing financial problems for many years. It is a permanent solution to a problem that is usually just temporary.

    For example, many couples are getting divorced after being in quarantine with their partner for several months due to the coronavirus pandemic. They decided they cannot spend so much time with their spouse. They cannot take it anymore. They are frustrated and in an effort to get their sanity and free time back, they turn to divorce as their only option.

    However, couples should not be rushing to divorce. Divorce is not a simple procedure and it should be used only as a last resort, when all else has failed. Quarantine should not be the reason for a divorce. However, it is highly likely that a couple who is divorcing now has had problems before COVID-19 came into play.

    Many couples start to think about divorce when they experience stressful situations, such as holidays, money problems, infidelity, or the death of a loved one. However, as a couple, you should be facing these challenges together. You should use these opportunities as a way to open up the lines of communication. You should not feel as if you are dealing with these problems on your own.

    If you feel as though you are not getting what you need out of your marriage, it is time to speak up. Let your spouse know how you feel. You should not let your problems fester up until you decide to file for divorce. For many people, a divorce announcement is unexpected. It is like a punch to the gut. They did not see it coming because they thought everything was fine with their marriage.

    If you are experiencing problems in your marriage, start working on them right away. Talk things over. Listen to your spouse. Seek counseling. Confide in a friend. Get a trial separation. Time away from your spouse may help you rediscover what you love about him or her. You may decide you cannot live without them.

    Divorce is Permanent

    Whatever you do, do not rush to divorce. Unless you and your children are in immediate danger, there is no hurry. Divorce is a long, difficult process. It will end your marriage. Once you divorce, there is no going back. You may think that the grass is greener on the other side, but that is not always true. Being single may be fun for a while, but you may get lonely after some time. Many people struggle with finances and co-parenting their children.

    Divorce should not be a rash decision, so do not consider it when you are tired or angry. Get a good night’s sleep and take some time to cool down so you can think clearly. If you have children, think about them. Is a divorce the best option? Consider your reasons. Are they valid or petty? Can you work on your problems?

    If you do decide that divorce is the only option, at least be strategic about it, especially in the strategic sense. Are you waiting on a huge tax refund? Will your spouse be getting a nice bonus soon? If so, then it may be beneficial to you to wait a little longer so you can take advantage of your finances. Also, this will give you time to locate all the financial records you will need in your divorce. This can save you money.

    Regret is Real

    You may think you are really sure about divorcing and will never regret your decision. Do not be so sure. Many people thought the same way and even years later wish that they could have done things differently in their marriage. For example, some people wish they did not depend on their spouse to make them happy. Only you can make yourself happy.

    Some people refuse to share their feelings. They bottle them up until they explode. You should not let this happen. Marriage is a give and take, so you both need to discuss your feelings in order for your relationship to grow.

    Some people made mistakes about careers and finances. While everyone should strive to become financially successful, neglecting your family in the process is hardly ever a good idea. You should never feel the need to put all your time into your job. Your spouse and kids need you too. When it is hard to achieve the right balance, family should always come first.

    Some also have regrets about money management. You should trust your gut when it comes to finances. There is no rule that says you have to get a joint bank account when you get married. If you are a saver, but your spouse is a huge spender, it may be wise to keep your money separate. Otherwise, you may discover that your spouse is spending all your hard-earned money, and financial issues are a major cause of divorce.

    Seek Legal Help

    Marriage can be quite the challenge even in the best of times. The COVID-19 quarantine, holidays, job loss, deaths and other extreme situations can make living with your partner unbearable. However, divorce is not always the best option.

    Divorce is not an easy process. It is a permanent solution and there is a lot involved. Do you really want this? Discuss your situation with Broward County divorce attorney Scott J. Stadler. He has more than 30 years of experience handling divorces and can help you make the right decisions. Get started with a consultation. Call our office at (954) 346-6464 or fill out the online form.