Many people get married with thoughts of a fairytale wedding and a marriage so full of love, laughter, and fun. Unfortunately, though, it very rarely works out this way. Marriage is a lot of work. It requires the effort of both partners. If only one person is carrying the load, resentment and bitterness add up quickly.
Many people have thoughts of divorce. They may be frustrated with their spouse for a variety of reasons. Maybe their spouse is not doing their fair share of housework or child care. Perhaps they are spending too much money or refusing to get a job. There may be infidelity, substance abuse, or gambling involved. Many couples also struggle with intimacy and communication.
The good news is that many issues can be managed with the help of an understanding therapist. Many couples seek counseling to help them with marital issues. However, therapy is not a cure-all for any marital issue.
There are a few common reasons why couples divorce. There is infidelity. They married too young. They have issues with communication or intimacy. They have grown apart and no longer act as partners anymore. There may be no emotional support.
These issues can be addressed in counseling, and it is possible for a couple to save their marriage if they have any of these problems. However, both parties must be willing to try to improve their marriage. That is because the dynamics of the relationship need to change in order for the marriage to survive. The problem is that many people are reluctant to change. They want to keep up with the status quo, but doing the same thing they did before will produce more conflict. If no change is made, then the marriage remains stagnant or gets even rockier.
If your spouse is unwilling to work on the marriage, you need to decide: Stay in an unhappy marriage or start the divorce process? If you are truly miserable, divorce is the only option. Do not sacrifice your physical or mental health. While you can divorce for any reason in Florida, here are some reasons to divorce that make the most sense.
Abuse
You should never tolerate abuse from your spouse, whether it is physical or emotional in nature. It is easy to spot physical abuse, but emotional abuse can be a little trickier to identify. In any case, if you or your children are scared of the other spouse, it is time to get out. Work with a lawyer to create a plan to escape your abusive living environment.
Addiction
Addiction to alcohol or drugs can be a frustrating situation to deal with. It can also be dangerous, especially if you have children. Your spouse may be under the influence while driving with children. You may want to do what you can to help your spouse, but at the same time, you need to protect yourself and your family.
Mental Illness
Mental illness can also be dangerous, especially if it is not treated. A person with severe mental illness can become violent. They may try to hurt you or the children. They may not be able to function daily, which means you are pretty much on your own. A mentally unstable person can become too much for you to handle. You may be left with no choice but to divorce your spouse.
Multiple Affairs
It is hard enough for a person to stick around after learning that their spouse has cheated on them once before. But if the spouse refuses to end the affair or has been caught with multiple affair partners, that is a huge breach of trust. If your spouse continues to engage in infidelity, it is time to end the marriage. Why would you want someone who clearly does not respect you? You deserve someone who is monogamous.
Abandonment
Your spouse could leave for work one day and never come back. If this is intentional and not due to a death, car accident, or crime, then it will likely be classified as abandonment. If your spouse left with no way to contact them, then they abandoned the marriage, and you should file for divorce. Why stay married to someone who no longer wants to live with you?
Your Spouse is Already Married
You may think you would know if your spouse was already married, but do not be so sure. If your spouse is constantly gone for “work,” they may have a secret life you do not know about. They could have another spouse and kids. Being married to multiple people is called bigamy, which is illegal. In fact, you may be able to annul your marriage in the case of bigamy, making it null and void.
Making a Tough Decision
The decision to divorce should never be taken lightly. It is a huge life event that will affect you and your children for a long time. If you do decide on a divorce, do not drag it out. Choose a collaborative divorce if it is possible to be respectful of all involved. Being amicable will help you move on more quickly.
Seek Legal Help
It can be hard to know when to divorce. Are you giving up too quickly, or should you have pulled the plug on the marriage years ago?
If you are seriously considering divorce, then it is time to move forward and just do it. Do not wait any longer. Get the help you need from Broward County divorce attorney Scott J. Stadler. To schedule a consultation, call (954) 346-6464 or fill out the online form.