Marriage is not a fairy tale. If you have decided to say “I do,” chances are you and your spouse are going to have disagreements at some point. Being married to someone with the intention of living together for the rest of your life is not an easy task. You may have different goals. People change. Couples often drift apart after a while. Friends, hobbies, and even work often become more important than your husband or wife.
The honeymoon period does not last forever. After a few years, you may notice the spark is almost gone. You may not feel as much attraction to your partner as you once did. You may not do things together anymore. Marriage may become dull and boring.
After a while, the thought of divorce may start to enter your head. There are many reasons why. Perhaps your wife cheated on you. Maybe your husband is abusive toward you. It may be that the two of you constantly argue over finances. You are just not happy anymore. You feel sad, even depressed most of the time.
This is not uncommon. In fact, the average marriage lasts just eight years. However, ending your marriage is not easy. There are many details involved. The process is time-consuming and costly. It can cause emotional damage to those involved, which is something you want to keep in mind if you have kids.
Should you work to save your marriage or focus on filing for divorce and moving on with your life? There is no easy answer. No two couples are alike. There are always different circumstances involved. Some couples are willing to put in the effort to save their marriage, while others have had enough and are ready to throw in the towel. Which applies to you?
A divorce is a personal decision. Only you can decide what will be best for you. However, there are some situations in which you might want to save your marriage. There are also many reasons why you should choose divorce. Read on to get a better understanding of your marriage and what your next steps should be.
Why Divorce
If you have been contemplating divorce, here are some signs that it is time to make the next step and call a lawyer.
- You think you would be better off alone. If your marriage is so unhappy that you wish you were living alone like you did before you said “I do,” then it may be time to consider divorce.
- There is infidelity in the marriage. Cheating does not always lead to divorce. However, if it is an occurrence that has happened numerous times and your spouse does not seem remorseful about his or her actions, then something is wrong with the marriage and it is time to end it.
- Marriage is no longer a partnership. A marriage requires the effort and commitment of both spouses. If one person is doing all the work, then one person is not fulfilling the needs of the other person. At this point, divorce should be the next step.
- You are the victim of abuse. A marriage should be a loving relationship. If your spouse is abusing you physically or emotionally, it is time to get out. Do not ever feel as though you have to stay in such a relationship. There are many resources that can help you.
Why Save Your Marriage
Divorce may not always be the best option. Here are some reasons why you should try to save your marriage.
- You enjoy spending time together. You both may have busy lives, but when you do spend time together, do you enjoy it, or wish he would just leave you alone? If you still treasure your time spend together and look forward to upcoming dates, then maybe you are meant for each other.
- You trust each other. If your wife treats you like a best friend and shares all her secrets and life moments with you, then she must trust you. If you can share your feelings with each other without judgment or criticism, then you likely have a solid marriage that should be worked on, not ended.
- You have a lot of great memories. A relationship can be fun. You may have fond memories of your first kiss or how you bonded over your child’s birth. You may remember the fun vacations or the concerts and events you attended together. If the good memories outweigh the bad, then it may be worth it to work on the marriage and make even better memories.
- You are still intimate with each other. If there is still kissing, cuddling, and sex in the marriage, then it is clear you both still have feelings for each other. If you two still have a desire to get intimate with each other even when things in the relationship are rocky, then there is a bond holding the marriage together. You do not want to destroy that with a divorce.
Exploring Your Options
Making the decision to divorce is something that needs to thought about thoroughly. It is a significant decision that will impact your life and your family forever. Getting a divorce is stressful and a huge financial undertaking. However, only you can decide if your marriage is worth saving. Many marriages are beyond repair.
If you are considering divorce, contact Scott J. Stadler today. He can assess your situation and let you know of your options. Contact him at (954) 346-6464 to schedule a consultation.