Divorce is a deeply personal experience. There are some common positive and negative aspects to the divorce process that are somewhat universal, but exactly how divorce will affect you depends on your individual circumstances. Preparing for the different aspects of divorce can help you transition through the divorce process in a healthier and more focused way.
Emotions Come with the Territory
Some people mistakenly believe divorce will be a pain-free process, especially if they are the ones to initiate the divorce process. Regardless of whether you are the person who has initiated divorce proceedings, you are still likely going to experience a range of difficult emotions throughout the divorce process. In fact, many people find it beneficial and sometimes even necessary to seek professional help in dealing with the emotions divorce is likely to bring. By being aware of the potential for these emotions, you can better prepare to handle them when they arise.
Do Not Rush the Process
The divorce process can be time-consuming, and many people facing divorce want it to be over as soon as possible. However, like most other important processes in life, taking your time can be beneficial. If you rush, you are likely to miss important details that could make the process take even longer than it otherwise would have. Additionally, rushing can cause you to overlook opportunities for a more appropriate settlement.
You May Still Need to Deal with Your Ex
Even after a divorce has been finalized, you may still need to interact with your ex, especially if you share children. You may also have shared financial interests or other concerns that need to be addressed after a divorce, including post-divorce division of property and/or any potential support arrangements. You should do your best to prepare for the idea of interacting with your ex after the divorce, which may include addressing issues that make communicating difficult.
Keep Your Children Away from Conflict
It is not uncommon for spouses going through the divorce process to have difficulty communicating with one another. If a spouse is responsible for certain actions that have led to divorce, it can be even more challenging to maintain a positive relationship after the fact. However, doing so can provide a solid example for your children to follow. Keeping conflict away from your children can help them adapt to circumstances that arise because of divorce. Allowing your feelings to get the best of you and giving into behaviors like badmouthing your ex in your children’s presence can ultimately weaken your children’s relationship with you as well as the other parent, and that can cause a lot of unnecessary difficulty in your relationship with your children.
Holidays Can be Harder than You Think
Even if you are looking forward to a divorce being finalized, holidays are almost certain to be difficult. The longer you have been married, the more difficult they can be, especially if you have children. If you are facing your first holiday alone after a divorce, it is important to take advantage of the opportunity to start over. Create new traditions that you can enjoy, and make sure that your children can partake in them. Be aware that there may be competing interests among family and friends that have a relationship with both you and your ex, and don’t let those potential issues get in the way of your relationships.
You May Lose Some Friends
No matter how strong you think your relationship with friends or family members is, divorce can test that strength. You will likely lose friends or family members during the divorce process, even those that you may have brought into the marriage. There is no real way to determine how people will react to the news of your divorce, but there is likely to be some emotional upheaval that touches various aspects of all of your relationships during a divorce. Remember that friendships are also a process that require investment and support, so be prepared to save some energy to devote to keeping these relationships strong and vibrant. Do not miss out on opportunities to create new friendships, and do not be surprised if friends you were not close to in the past turn into some of the most supportive relationships during and after your divorce.
Take Your Time with Dating
It is not a good idea to rush into dating again right away, as tempting as it may seem. Even if you think you are ready, you might not be. Divorce is one of the most stressful processes in life, and emerging from it successfully is a process in and of itself. Give yourself time to heal and make sure you are ready for all of the benefits and demands of a new relationship. It is especially important to avoid dating until after a divorce is finalized. While nothing legally prohibits you from dating during the divorce, doing so can bring a lot more frustration and drama than anticipated. Dating during a divorce even has the potential to impact your final divorce settlement. Avoiding dating can be especially difficult when friends and family members try to help you get back into the dating scene. Remember that only you know when the appropriate time to consider another relationship is.
Maintain Your Legal Relationship
You may think that once your divorce has been finalized, you will not have much of a reason to speak with your divorce attorney. However, there are many reasons why you may need to continue working with your Florida divorce lawyer. For instance, circumstances could arise that demand revisiting support and/or custody orders. It is often easier to return to someone that has become familiar with the details of your case so that you do not have to waste time and money starting over with a new attorney. An experienced Florida divorce attorney can help you understand the demands of the Florida divorce process as well as provide insight on what circumstances could require you to need an attorney after divorce. If you have questions about how divorce might impact you, contact Scott J. Stadler to schedule a consultation where you can find out more about what a Florida divorce entails and how you might be able to navigate that process.