When people think of cheaters, they tend to envision men. However, women can be cheaters as well. In fact, the gap is growing, with more and more women turning to infidelity, particularly younger women. Between 1990 and 2010, the number of women who cheat increased by almost 40%. Studies show that women between 18 and 29 years old were slightly more likely than men to cheat (11% vs. 10%).
Why are women starting to cheat more? Experts say that they are not feeling satisfied in their marriages. In the past, people got married primarily for financial reasons. They got a partner to help raise their children.
Nowadays, women expect a lot more out of marriage. They want not only to be taken care of, but they want a best friend, great sex, happiness, and everything else. They want all their needs to be fulfilled by marriage, and that is not always realistic.
Women have a lot more choices nowadays, too. They can go to school and get an education so they can start a career. They can work outside the home and raise families. They can work from home or start their own business. But with all these choices comes dissatisfaction, and that leads women to get their needs met elsewhere. They justify this by saying that their spouse does not make them happy, so they search for happiness elsewhere. And this search for happiness often leads to divorce.
There are many reasons why women may cheat and cause the demise of their marriage. Here are some of them in more detail.
Dissatisfaction
This is the underlying theme when it comes to most acts of infidelity. They are unhappy in their marriage, so they justify crossing the line by believing that their partner will not care or that the marriage was rocky anyway, so it does not matter. Once the cheater justifies their actions, they feel more comfortable getting their needs met elsewhere, with someone else. They then use the act of cheating to end their marriage.
Lack of Sex
Men are not the only ones who want sex all the time. Many women also have high libidos, and when their spouses do not fulfill their sexual needs, they will go look elsewhere. In long-term marriages, sex may no longer be an important part of the marriage, but in these relatiobnships, there may be a partner who does not want the sexual part of the marriage to end.
Lack of Excitement
Some people cheat simply because they get a thrill out of it. Let’s face it—marriage can be boring. Most days consist of working, coming home, cooking, cleaning, and going to bed. It is possible for a woman to love her partner, but yearn for the days when their relationship was brand new and exciting. They miss the passion and will turn to cheating to get back that adrenaline rush.
Fill Emotional Needs
When men cheat, it is typically because they want sex. When women cheat, it is not always about the sex. Sometimes they have emotional affairs with other men. In these situations, there is no sex at all. They just enjoy the conversation with someone else. They get support, respect, empathy, or something else that is lacking from their spouse. Keep in mind, though, that even though there is no sex involved, an emotional affair can still have consequences for your marriage.
Loneliness
Some women cheat because they are simply lonely. Their spouse may work long hours, leaving them alone by themselves or with the kids all day, every day. It can be hard for them to make friends, so to ward off the feelings of isolation, they may meet someone online and start an affair. When a person is lonely and someone pays attention to them or gives them company, it can lead to an emotional or sexual affair.
Low Self-Esteem
Many women are motivated to have affairs because they feel bad about themselves. Their husband may not give them compliments or show any interest in them, so they cheat to validate themselves. Someone may show them attention and they crave it. It feels good, so they keep the affair going. Once it ends, they find new love interests, and the cycle continues.
Midlife Crisis
Just like men, women can also suffer from the effects of a midlife crisis. Between the ages of 35 and 60, a woman can suffer a midlife crisis after a major life event, such as a milestone birthday (think #40 or #50) or the death of a parent. Plus, women start to suffer from hormonal changes as they prepare for menopause. At around this time, they may start to think about their mortality and assess what they have done with their lives. They may discover that they are facing a losing battle with their marriage. They may start to desire younger men in order to maintain their youth, so some engage in cheating in an attempt to ward off the aging process.
Seek Legal Help
Anybody—men or women—can cheat on their partners. Women are increasingly feeling frustrated with their lives. They are getting their needs met outside of their marriages, which can lead to jealousy and divorce.
While some marriages survive infidelity, most do not. Broward County divorce attorney Scott J. Stadler can help you move on from a marriage filled with dishonesty and a lack of trust. We have decades of experience handling divorce issues. Schedule a consultation today by calling (954) 346-6464 or filling out the online form.